Collection I

I have no title for this other than "Collection I".  These are old, old pieces that I'd found in some obviously old notebooks of mine.   Felt like sharing.  Often times, I'll write things with no direction, no aim, and no real method other than to do just that -write.
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I wonder what life would be like if we, as society, ran into the same evils or joys as in the movies.  At times I’d watch scary movies and hope something would put me in such a thrilling situation in which my drunk and high friends and I are pitted against a horde of zombies or even an axe-wielding psycho.  It would open up opportunities – I could write a book!  “I Knew Someone Who Was A Teenage Werewolf!”  Nah, I could never write a book.  Who would read it?  My family?  My friends?  I’m pretty sure enemies would buy it just to burn it and piss on the ashes.  But much like a child prone to sticking his head in things, I push forward not thinking of the aftermath.  But I’m okay with it if you are.  I suppose I am throwing caution to the wind; opening these windows and letting you in.  Would you ever think that everyone’s daily routine is a rehearsal in this sit-com of life?  Doesn’t life feel like a sit-com sometimes?

Filmed and lived before a live studio audience…
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Pre-Chewed Pencils

I once got a chain letter email that asked “What’s greater than God, worse than the Devil, and if you eat it you will die?”

A friend of mine was certain the answer was “Love”.  Her reason was “When you’re in love it’s greater than God.  When you lose that love it feels worse than the Devil and…”  And she stopped dead.  I asked, “Say…  How do you eat love?”  So that answer was out of the question.  I put a lot of thought into it.  Usually I don’t care about these things but I was curious.  I’m not a very religious person so I should have noticed from the get-go that no matter what logical answer I give it’s not the one they’re looking for.  And that was the case.  My answer after plenty of thoughts from different angles: Bleach.  Bleach can get stains out of clothes, can God?  Bleach can stain & remove color from clothes, can the Devil?  If you eat bleach, you’ll die…depending.  Well I’ll be damned if they didn’t want logic.  The answer THEY were looking for: Nothing.  And of course they didn’t acknowledge that bleach made sense.  All I heard of that was “No, you’re wrong.  The answer is nothing.”  …Figures.
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George Bailey Syndrome

From when I was little to even now I’ve always felt ‘in the way of things’.  I’ve always felt like the pity-case or the other guy or the last resort.  I’ve always felt like whatever girlfriend I have had didn’t really want me anyway, like I was just there and it was easier that way.  I wonder about some of my friends too.  Like if I’m actually just a friend of a friend to them.  I wish more people would tell each other how much they mean to them.  So many people are gone that will never know how much they meant to the ones they were close to.  And people will never be able to tell them what they meant or find about themselves either.  I tell people and they always act weird about it like I’m coming on to them or something.  I’ve just always had this feeling (call it a fear or hope) I’m going to die young, so I want to let people know what they mean to me, and what an influence they’ve been on my life.  I’d like to see what life would be like without me.  Call it George Bailey Syndrome, call it what you will.
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I’m just a waste of space with a pen and all I ever wanted was to be wanted.
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Growing Older

When I was younger, circa 16-17, in high school I wished I had X-Ray vision to look at people naked.  Nowadays I just wish I could turn invisible so I could rob a bank and my wife, children, and I can relocate to a tropical island and just be.
Priorities.
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