Dating.

DATING.

Written by Christopher Michael Carter

FADE IN

INT. A BAR - NIGHT

Busy. Smoky yet bright atmosphere. People dance to Top Forty hits playing on the radio.

A WOMAN - beautiful, thick, young redhead – sits at the bar, sipping her drink. Dolled up and dressed nice. She looks over.

GUY – young, average, not dressed for the surroundings – looks around him before looking back at her. He smiles – unintentionally goofy.

He stands up and walks over to her. Timid and shy, he attempts a strut.

GUY

Hi, I don’t normally do this but do you think I could get your number?

Hesitant at first, she pulls a pen from her cleavage and writes her number on a cocktail napkin and slides it over, winking.

EXT. PARK – DAY

Guy sits on a park bench with JOE – older, slobby, a contrast to Guy. Fast food bags sit between them.

JOE

(Chewing his food)

So you asked for her number, and then what?

GUY

She gave it to me, and I walked away.

JOE

She gave you the number, right after you asked for it. You didn’t buy her a drink, or stir up small talk. You got the number and left.

GUY

Yeah.

JOE

(Shaking his head)

Man…

GUY

(Sarcastic)

Love your ability to play back a scenario right after it was told to you.

JOE

Ya got balls, kid.

Guy puts his burger down, sighing and rolling his eyes.

GUY

Do I now?

JOE

Yeah. You had nothing to really help you out. You didn’t buy her a drink, give her a joke or a funny story. No real pickup line. Ballsy move.

GUY

(Sarcastic)

Well that’s me, Ballsy.

(Takes a drink of his soda)

…So you think I should have used a joke?

JOE

(Very stern)

No. Horseshit.

GUY

(Sarcasm again)

Of course not. What was I thinking?

Joe stops and looks at Guy for a moment.

JOE

What face did you use?

Guy’s caught off guard.

GUY

I’m sorry?

JOE

How did you carry yourself? What face did you use?

Guy nods, understanding.

GUY

Oh, I just kinda strutted over like this.

Guy cocks his shoulders back like a chicken, bobs his head and makes a cheeseball smile. He gets closer to Joe.

Joe SLAPS him in the face.

JOE

(Serious)

Don’t ever do that face again.

GUY

(Holding his cheek)

Bad?

JOE

(Shaking his head)

Terrible. When are you gonna call her?

GUY

Well, I already did when I got home from the bar.

JOE

(Flabbergasted)

You called her that night!? You’re not even supposed to call her!

GUY

What…?

Joe sweeps his arms out.

JOE

You don’t call.

GUY

(Shaking his head)

No call?

JOE

(Shaking his head)

No call.

GUY

(Shrugging)

Yeah but I think it went okay.

INT. SPLITSCREEN, TWO HOUSES - NIGHT

Guy - still in his clothes from earlier, excited - on the phone.

The woman’s beat – hair down and wet, no makeup, in a robe.

Guy is laser-focused while the phone rings.

She looks at the phone, confused.

WOMAN

Hello?

GUY

Hi, uh, Cherry?

CHERRY

Yes, who’s calling?

GUY

Well, you never got my name but you gave me your number at the bar earlier tonight.

CHERRY

(Towel drying her hair)

I gave my number out a lot tonight.

GUY

Ah, okay. Well I was the one that kinda just left after getting the number…?

CHERRY

(Stops drying)

Oh, the guy who didn’t buy me a drink.

GUY

(Wincing)

…Yes, that’s me. I’m so glad you remembered.

Cherry walks over to her bed.

CHERRY

I’m surprised you even called.  Guys usually don’t call; it just helps the self-esteem, the ego, getting the number.

GUY

Well of course I was gonna call. I’m…not…

Guy struggles finding his wording. He throws his arms up in confusion, grasping.

CHERRY

(Rolling her eyes)

Let me guess, you’re not like other guys.

GUY

(Mouthing silently, clenches fist)

Damn.

She yawns and waits.

GUY

Well I…

CHERRY

(Very serious)

Look, I gotta get up really early to take my kid to daycare so I’m gonna have to cut this short. I didn’t even catch your name, guy.

GUY

(Smiling)

Well it’s Guy, actually.

Cherry’s put off.

CHERRY

Your name is Guy?

GUY

(Still smiling)

Yeah.

She laughs and hangs up.

GUY

(Instantly straight-faced)

Uh, hello?

EXT. PARK - DAY

Done with their burgers, they throw their trash away. A soccer team practices behind them.

Guy steps away from Joe and faces the camera. Joe scratches himself.

GUY

(To the camera)

See that?

(Motioning to Joe)

Joe clears his throat and spits big into the trashcan. Random people pass by repulsed by him.

GUY (CONT’D)

Yeah, that. That’s my Uncle Joe.  Rough around the edges isn’t a good enough description. He was recently released from prison and found out I was going to school in the area so he decided to stop in for a few minutes to say hello… That was ten days ago.

Joe shrugs with his hands out.

JOE

Hey… We goin’?

Guy doesn’t look back.

GUY

(Frustrated)

Yeah, we’re going.

The two walk over to Guy’s car as two NUNS walk by – in full dress.

NUN 1

Oh, did you hear about Sister Shelly’s new plan to help the homeless?

Guy gives them a polite smile-and-nod. They respond kindly in return.

NUN 2

No. How does it look?

NUN 1

I really think it’s gonna work. She’s on to something…

Guy gets in the car. Joe takes notice of the Nuns.

His head nods back and he smiles crookedly.

JOE

Hey, honey! Yo, baby!

The nuns flinch a little before moving on faster.

Guy peaks his head out.

GUY

I thought we were going.

JOE

(Defeated)

Yeah, yeah.

Joe drags himself back to the passenger side with his head hung.

JOE

(To himself)

Eh…

Guy starts the car and back out.

Other people in the park are picnicking and playing Frisbee.

The car exits the park.

GUY (O.S.)

So, nuns, huh? You were in a long time.

JOE (O.S.)

(Dry)

Shut it.

CUT

END

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