Adam and the Death Ray

ADAM AND THE DEATH RAY

Written by Christopher Michael Carter

FADE IN

INT. PAWNSHOP - DAY

Fairly empty. One customer. ADAM – young, bored, high schooler - looks around.

The CLERK behind the counter – older, weathered, full denim ensemble - watches him over his newspaper.

Adam walks up to the front counter. The Clerk wipes his mouth on his sleeve.

Adam looks at the knives and guns in the case. Each weapon and their variants look so cool to his juvenile mind.

The Clerk’s eyes don’t leave his potential customer.

Adam taps on top of the glass.

CLERK

Lookin’ for a firearm, there, bub?

Adam looks up at him as if just noticing he was there.

ADAM

Oh, I was just looking.

His attention is grabbed by something in the case.

ADAM

Whoa, what’s that!?

A rather futuristic looking piece sits among the more standard firearms - chrome and black, but not shaped like the other handguns.

CLERK

(Matter-of-factly)

Uh, well that’s a death ray.

The young man’s now excited.

ADAM

No shit? How does it work?

The older man scratches head.

CLERK

Causes death, I reckon.

Adam calms down and puts on a mature/serious face.

ADAM

Well, well yeah, of course.

CLERK

(Nods)

Of course.

ADAM

…Don’t they all cause death?

CLERK

Well, yeah…but this is a “Death Ray”.

ADAM

(Shrugging)

Fair enough. How much?

CLERK

(Grinning)

How much ya got?

Adam turns around with his back towards the Clerk.

He counts over $60.

And turns back around.

ADAM

Eleven.

CLERK

I’ll take it.

He’s shocked.

ADAM

Great.

The money and weapon are exchanged.

CLERK

There ya go.

The two shake hands after transaction.

Adam exits. The Clerk puts the money in the register and goes back to reading the newspaper.

EXT. PAWNSHOP

The pawnshop sign hangs on the downtown building.

Adam leaves the shop with his brand new death ray.

FADE OUT

ADAM AND THE DEATH RAY

FADE IN

INT. ADAM’S HOUSE, LIVING ROOM

A pretty plain house with framed family pictures.

Adam sits on the couch with a chip bag in his lap while admiring his death ray.

CAPTION - Hours later…

His head bobs to the music that’s on TV. His phone rings. He mutes the television and answers with a mouth full of chips.

ADAM

Hewwo? Aw, hey ma’.

(Swallows the chips)

What’s up? Ah, not shit, not shit. I bought something at the pawn shop… Yeah, it’s apparently a Death Ray.

(Beat)

Well, if the name serves it right, it should be used for killing things. …Yeah, see. Alright well come over so we can try this thing out on some birds or somethin’… Alright, later.

He hangs up the phone and watches TV, bored.

Still muted, a talk show features people discussing ‘important’ issues.

Adam sighs and waves the weapon at the program.

ADAM

You’re lucky…

A fly lands on his face and he fans it away.

The fly keeps coming back bugging him. He fans and dodges but it isn’t working.

ADAM

Damn it.

Adam tries to shoot the fly with the weapon playfully and-

Accidentally shoots his sister’s CAT.

He stands, stopped and stunned. It works.

ADAM

Uh, whoa…

Adam stares down at the dead feline for a few seconds. Chip crumbs falling from his mouth. He swallows the last of his chips with a hard gulp.

ADAM

Jinx? …Jinxy?

The housecat twitches barely and then lies still.

ADAM

This is the point of time where one needs a life ray.

Adam inspects the Death Ray.

ADAM

No reverse switch. Hmm. I wonder if this goes through glass.

He points it out of the glass front door and looks away pulling the trigger.

RANDOM PERSON (O.S.)

Hey, the mailman fell down!

Adam’s reacts. His arms drop to his side. His mouth drops in disbelief with his eyes wide.

ADAM

Ah, shit.

FADE OUT

FADE IN

INT. ADAM’S HOUSE – A BIT LATER

Friend and classmate, BRENNAN, enters - around Adam’s age, same type of clothing.

Adam’s sits in the chair while the MAILMAN - blue uniform and hat with a gray mustache - is propped up on the couch. Jinx is in his lap.

ADAM

What’s up, buddy?

BRENNAN

Not shit. You?

ADAM

Chillin’.

Brennan’s eyes go back and forth between the apparent sleeping Mailman on the couch and Adam, casually watching TV.

He waits a moment before commenting.

BRENNAN

Jinx got a new friend?

ADAM

Huh?

BRENNAN

Why is the mailman asleep on your couch?

ADAM

He’s not, he’s dead. What took you so long?

BRENNAN

Eh, I had to mow the lawn.

(It hits him)

Wait what!?

ADAM

Yeah dude, the death ray works. I fuckin’ shot him, he’s dead.

Brennan appropriately freaks out.

Adam doesn’t seem to see the severity of the situation and is more enamored with the absurdity that is the death ray.

BRENNAN

Are you sure? What the hell’s going on?

ADAM

I can’t call the cops; I don’t wanna go to jail.

BRENNAN

Why did you do it?

ADAM

I didn’t see him coming up to the door and I didn’t know it would really work.

BRENNAN

It says “Death Ray” on the side of it!

ADAM

I didn’t know it was real. I thought it looked cool and, hello, it’s called a Death Ray.

BRENNAN

…Okay, I’ll give you that much. But still, we gotta do something with him and what the hell is wrong with the cat?

ADAM

Accidentally shot him before shooting the mailman.

BRENNAN

Then how did ya not know if it would work or not!?

His question gives Adam pause.

ADAM

Hm… Ya know, I don’t know.

BRENNAN

Oh my God. Okay, okay we gotta move him.

ADAM

But my sister gets home in like twenty minutes.

BRENNAN

Okay, we gotta bury it.

EXT. BACKYARD

The two walk with a shovel, and Jinx in a grocery bag.

ADAM

Okay, hopefully this won’t take long.

BRENNAN

Yeah, over here’s good.

They stop.

ADAM

Wait, what do I tell my sister?

Brennan lets out a flustered sigh.

BRENNAN

Tell her you accidentally left the door open and Jinx ran away.

ADAM

No, dude, then she’d be mad at me.

BRENNAN

Not half as mad as if you’d tell her the truth: that you shot it with a death ray from the pawn shop.

ADAM

Good point, let’s get to work.

Adam tosses the bag to the side and shoves the shovel to the ground and starts digging when-

A fat Chihuahua comes around the corner.

BRENNAN

Whose dog is that?

ADAM

Fuckin’ neighbor’s dog, Ted.

(To Ted)

Ted, go away! Go away, Ted!

Ted bites a hold of the grocery bag and starts to take off.

BRENNAN

The bag!

Adam stops digging and they chase Ted around the back yard, missing him at every turn.

The three stop. The two standing on either sides of the small dog dragging a dead cat in a bag by its mouth.

BRENNAN

Got any food on you?

Adam checks his pockets from his pants up to his coat and reveals…

ADAM

A candy bar.

BRENNAN

Open it, throw it.

He chucks the candy bar and Ted drops Jinx and follows suit. A collective sigh of relief.

ADAM

Ya know how bad that dog’s gonna get backed up?

BRENNAN

Not our problem.

ADAM

We should’ve had that death ray out here then.

He continues to dig.

BRENNAN

We oughta bury that too so it won’t cause any more harm.

ADAM

No way, dude. I’m taking it back to the pawn shop and at least get my money back. Hand me the bag.

They bury Jinx and fill the hole with dirt.

BRENNAN

Guess we better take care of the other problem now before it gets too dark.

ADAM

Let’s take your car.

BRENNAN

Why my car?

ADAM

It’s a station wagon, there’s more room.

BRENNAN

True, but–

ADAM

Plus, I don’t want a dead guy in my car. Ew.

BRENNAN

He’s your fuckin’ dead guy!

ADAM

(Arms up in surrender)

Okay. Alright. Okay.

BRENNAN

Okay.

Brennan’s sure the conversation is over when…

ADAM

Rock, paper, scissors.

BRENNA

What?

Adam holds his fist out.

ADAM

C’mon.

BRENNAN

You’re serious. Ugh, alright.

ADAM

We goin’ ‘one, two, three, go’ or on three?

BRENNAN

Just ‘one, two, go’. So, on three.

ADAM

Okay.

One, two – Brennan picks rock. Adam picks scissors.

ADAM

Shit, best two out of three.

BRENNAN

No, we’re taking your car. Let’s go.

ADAM

(To himself)

Why did I pick scissors?

BRNNAN

What?

ADAM

Nothin’…

INT. ADAM’S HOUSE

The Mailman’s propped up on the couch.

The two confused young men stand over him.

ADAM

Well, should we wrap him in something?

BRENNAN

Probably like a sheet or something.

ADAM

Or we could just prop him up in the back seat and buckle him in.

BRENNAN

(Sarcastic)

Yeah, that way it looks like we’re just chillin’ with the mailman.

ADAM

(Shrugging)

Yeah.

Brennan rolls his eyes.

ADAM

What?

BRENNAN

Got a sleeping bag?

ADAM

Nothing this big.

BRENNAN

Your family’s gonna be home soon, right?

ADAM

Yeah. Okay, let’s find some sheets. Actually, watch him, I’ll be right back.

Adam exits.

A smell hits Brennan, he sniffs. He waves his hand in front of his scrunched up face.

BRENNAN

Whew.

He takes a pack of gum from his pocket and un-wraps a piece.

Adam returns with a stack of sheets.

ADAM

I hope these work… Whatcha got?

BRENNAN

Spearmint. Want some?

ADAM

Nah, I prefer cinnamon.

BRENNAN

Suit yourself.

Brennan puts the pack back in his pocket. Adam stops and begins to sniff.

ADAM

What’s that smell?

BRENNAN

You smell it too?

ADAM

Yeah.

The two sniff around the room and are eventually led to the Mailman.

BRENNAN

I think your dead man soiled himself.

ADAM

What?

BRENNAN

I’ve read when people die they lose control of their bowels.

Adam leans over him sniffing.

ADAM

I think it got on my couch.

BRENNAN

Just flip the cushion. Let’s wrap him up before your family gets back.

ADAM

Right. Wait, where are we goin’?

BRENNAN

I figured we’d take him downtown.

INT. ADAM’S HOUSE/NEIGHBORHOOD STREET - MOVING

They carry him out of the house and down the porch.

Brennan has his legs while Adam has his shoulders, both looking around trying not to seem suspicious.

ADAM

I can’t believe we gotta take my car.

BRENNAN

Shouldn’t have gone with scissors.

ADAM

What?

BRENNAN

Nothing.

They’re just about to the car when Adam drops his end of the corpse.

ADAM

Wait.

Brennan’s aggravated.

BRENNAN

What!?

ADAM

Should we finish his rout so no one gets suspicious?

BRENNAN

What? Will you get the damn body!

ADAM

Alright, alright.

They make it to the car.

ADAM

Wait, lemme get the trunk.

BRENNAN

Adam, if you drop him one more time, we’re gonna have to get another set of sheets.

ADAM

Why? Those will be… Ohhh, okay.  I’ll just set it down.

They balance the body while Adam unlocks the trunk.

BRENNAN

One. Two. THREE!

In unison the guys move the postal worker from the ground into the trunk.

BRENNAN

Whew.

ADAM

He is a heavy bastard.

BRENNAN

Or was.

Enter local jogger, DIANNA - single, well-kept, middle aged woman with a blonde dye job.

ADAM

(Quietly to Brennan)

Oh, shit, it’s Dianna.

DIANNA

Hey, boys.

ADAM

Hi.

BRENNAN

Hey, D.

Dianna jogs in place while talking to them. Brennan tries to play it cool. Adam’s visibly nervous.

DIANNA

How you boys doin’?

BRENNAN

Oh, we’re alright.

ADAM

Fine, fine. Normal afternoon.

DIANNA

Pew, if I was you boys I’d hit the laundry mat for them sheets. They smell like shit.

ADAM

Well…

BRENNAN

That’s what we were on our way to do, actually.

The two look at each other making sure they’re staying on the same page.

They shut the trunk.

DIANNA

Good, no girl you bring over will ever lie down on some stinky ass sheets. Let me tell you.

BRENNAN

(Motioning over to Adam)

That’s what I keep tellin’ him.

DIANNA

(Checking her watch)

Alright, well I need to finish my jog and get on home.

ADAM

Alrighty, take care.

DIANNA

Mhm. You, too. You boys have fun.

BRENNAN

Oh we will. Goodbye.

They wave as she leaves.

ADAM

Ugh, this dude reeks.

BRENNAN

Let’s go.

INT/EXT. ADAM’S CAR

On the way downtown.

ADAM

So what’s the plan?

BRENNAN

I figured we’ll hit an alleyway downtown and toss him in a dumpster.

ADAM

Have you done this before?

BRENNAN

(Casually)

Nope, read it in a book.

ADAM

Ah.

They’re silent for a while.

BRENNAN

Ya know… Dianna’s pretty hot.

ADAM

Ugh.

BRENNAN

What?

ADAM

Dude, she’s in her fifties.

BRENNAN

I’m not talking about doing anything. Just saying she’s hot.

ADAM

Eh.

BRENNAN

Bah, what do you know?

ADAM

Alright, pick an alley ya want.

They drive slowly checking out alleys.

BRENNAN

This one over here looks pretty deserted.

ADAM

I should probably back up into it.  Alright, watch that side for me.  How we doin’?

Brennan sticks his head out of the window checking out the space.

BRENNAN

We’re good.

EXT. ALLEYWAY

The car tries to squeeze between crates and the brick wall to get to the back dumpster. A large, loud SCRAPE.

INT/EXT. ADAM’S CAR

The brakes are hit.

ADAM

Shit, what was that?

Brennan’s head out of the window, wide eyed.

BRENNAN

Nothing, we’re good.

Adam continues backing the car up.

ADAM

Okay, here we go.

EXT. ALLEYWAY

The alleyway is secluded and shadowed by the buildings.

BRENNAN

As soon as we get back to town, you’re pawning that damn thing off.

ADAM

I know. I know.

The two get out of the car.

BRENNAN

Why would you buy a Death Ray anyway?

ADAM

I did it for us. I figured we could go shoot birds or squirrels or something. I didn’t expect to kill anyone let alone the mailman.

BRENNAN

It said ‘Death Ray’. It’s called a Death… Ray.

ADAM

(Shrugging)

I know. I just wasn’t thinking.

Darkness. The trunk opens with them looking in.

BRENNAN

I’m wondering how the pawn shop got it. Like do stores carry it?

ADAM

Maybe some disgruntled scientist needed the money so he pawned it off.

BRENNAN

(Sarcastically)

Psh, yeah, that’s what happened.

(Motioning to the body)

Let’s get this.

They start to pick him up, struggling.

ADAM

What if it’s from space?

BRENNAN

Sheesh, Adam, shut up and grab his feet.

ADAM

Okay. One. Two. Three!

They hurl him into the dumpster with a loud THUD when a MAN’s voice is heard.

BUM (O.S.)

Ya know…

They both jump back – surprised, terrified.

Adam & Brennan’s backs slam against the dumpster.

ADAM

Ah!

BRENNAN

Oh, shit!

An old BUM – dirty, heavily bearded, in filthy rags - sits behind a crate, eating.

ADAM

Jeez, buddy, you scared the hell out of us.

BRENNAN

How long have you been sitting there?

BUM

Long enough, I suppose.

The two freeze with large, wide eyes.

ADAM

So… What now?

The three look back and forth at each other.

BUM

Ya know, if ya killed him with a death ray, chances are they’re no marks to show for it. You guys could’ve hid the death ray and called 9-1-1 saying he had a heart attack.

Realization.

Adam & Brennan look at each other and then hang their heads. They open their mouths to speak but nothing comes out.

The home-challenged man continues eating, going on about his day.

INT/EXT. ADAM’S CAR

Silence. They look at each other on occasion with disbelief.

ADAM

I don’t know what’s worse; the fact that he thought of all that or the fact that we didn’t.

BRENNAN

I don’t know. Luckily he was willing to keep his mouth shut for about thirty seven dollars, Dianna’s number, and some taffy.

ADAM

It could have turned out bad.

BRENNAN

Yeah, but it looks like we’re in the clear.

Adam starts chuckling quietly in spurts and then soon ERUPTS into laughter.

BRENNAN

What’s so funny?

ADAM

Dianna’s number.

BRENNAN

Oh, she’s gonna love that call.

ADAM

Yeah, she is.

They laugh it up…

FADE OUT

INT. PAWNSHOP

Adam enters, seeing the same Clerk behind the counter.

CLERK

Hey, kid, what can I help ya with?

Adam sets the Death Ray on the counter.

ADAM

I was in here today and bought this. Eh, I’m here to pawn it.

CLERK

Already?

ADAM

Eh, yeah.

CLERK

Oh, piece of junk, huh?

He pauses, shifty-eyed.

ADAM

…Something like that.

CLERK

I’ll give ya five bucks.

Adam’s face drops in disappointment.

ADAM

Five? I paid you eleven for it.

CLERK

Five bucks.

ADAM

Oh, alright.

The Clerk pays him.

Adam walks through the pawnshop, heading out, when something catches his eye.

A seemingly empty jar with a label that reads as such:

ADAM

(In awe)

Wow, Invisible Jumping Spiders… No way.

And another label, a smaller label, behind its title:

ADAM

Huh… Warning: Extremely Dangerous.

He walks back up to the counter.

CLERK

Find ya something?

ADAM

Yeah.

The Clerk takes a long look at the jar.

CLERK

Ah yes, Invisible Jumping Spiders.

ADAM

Yep.

The Clerk leans forward with grave importance.

CLERK

(Stern)

You do have your Spider License, right?

Adam’s confused; borderline worried.

ADAM

Uh… what?

CLERK

I’m just kiddin’ ya’. That’ll be $6.50.

Adam breathes a confused sigh of relief.

ADAM

Alright, here ya go.

He pays him.

CLERK

Now be careful with these – they’re extremely dangerous.

ADAM

So I’ve read.

CLERK

Well, I’ll be seeing you.

ADAM

(Walking away)

Oh, I’m sure. Later.

Adam exits. The Clerk watches from the counter.

CLERK

…Sooner than you think.

INT/EXT. ADAM’S CAR

Brennan now in the driver’s seat. Adam enters with a smirk.

BRENNAN

…What?

ADAM

Welllll…

BRENNAN

You bought something else didn’t you?

Brennan’s frustrated. Adam can tell.

ADAM

Yeah, well just wait a minute. Check it out.

He hands Brennan the jar.

BRENNAN

Invisible Jumping Spiders? This is ridiculous. Why do you have to buy such crap?

ADAM

Well—

BRENNAN

No, dude.

EXT. THE STREET

The car stops. Brennan tosses the jar out of the window into a trash can on the corner, breaking. They drive on.

ADAM (O.S.)

Aww man.

BRENNAN (O.S.)

I know. I know.

The car continues on in the distance. The scattering of insects is heard…
FADE TO BLACK

THE END

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