Thursday, September 3, 2020

Right Quick

I haven’t been keeping up on this blog, but it’s because I’ve been so busy.


My wife and I are gearing up to self-publish a horror anthology we’d written 4 or 5 years ago.


I’ve just submitted Blue Sweep to a few publishers. If nobody wants it, I will continue on with its self-published rerelease.


A little horror novel I finished early this year is sitting at Supposed Crimes right now — some exciting news on that at a later date.


My zombie book is still undergoing rewrites but it’s shaping up.


The vampire story is surprising me. It’s about halfway finished, if not a little over. I’m very excited about it.


The Christian mystery is rolling right along. Another rotation and it’ll be finished.


The rotation has really helped me stay focused as well as giving some breathing room between projects.


That’s all I got for you today.

Friday, July 17, 2020

The Process -- A Poem

So this is one of my favorite pieces from Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights, but when I was posting a select few, this one (and more) were too long for Twitter or Instagram.




"The Process"

The curser blinks on an otherwise blank screen
The white stares back at me
My mind plays the possibilities
The characters deliver their lines
And move to their respective spots
My fingers move across the keys
Playing stenographer in a room full of people I’ve created
A line is flubbed
The current situation has taken a left turn
And is now off the rails
My fingers stop and I get out of my director’s chair
I pull them back to where it went south
And offer new directions
New possibilities
I wait to see how it unfolds
The curser awaits
The blank white yearns to be filled
While I look like a crazy person staring at the screen with apparent blank eyes
The action unfolds
It gets good
My fingers try to keep up
It’s working, it’s really working
I stop to assess the situation
Characters pause on a cliffhanger
And look to me for what happens next
The writer’s room in my head is alive
Pitches and suggestions are thrown out
Some fall flat, some stick
My fingers are like my characters
Waiting for the right moment
The ideas align like cogs in a wheel
It continues and words flow forth
My characters talk
My fingers fly
My mind edits
Delete delete delete
Pull it back
Begin again
No time for the curser to pulse
Pushing imaginary people to their limits
And I’ve reached mine
All avenues have been exhausted
Pride and happiness swells
Until
I read over everything
And hate every word
They’ve all deceived me
My hands, my characters
The writer’s room as a whole
And I walk away
I carry on with the standard actions of a mundane day
But all the while my brain works
The writers scramble to meet their quota
To crack the code and fix the problem
Nothing comes
I want to scrap it all and start over
The writers and characters plead with me
Sleep on it, they say
I do what I’m supposed to, say what I’m supposed to say
But inside I struggle
While my body lives on autopilot
My mind works hard on a puzzle box with infinite sides
And just before I drift off to sleep
It comes to me - the answer
A choice to make
Get up and rush to get it down
Or try to infuse my dreams
When I next look at the scattered black over the white page
My hatred is gone
And I’m in love again
The routine starts all over
Love passion hatred love
The work
Mental strains, tired fingers and tired eyes
A restless spirit until completion
When flesh is put on the skeleton
I work to put a layer of skin on my creation
Before I dissect it
I surgically take out malignant parts
And remove blockage
The writer’s room fights over what’s benign and what’s not
The work is constructed and reconstructed
The tired strain stays
Nothing looks familiar
A mess of notes and random conversations between make believe people
I walk away again but it never leaves me
Never leaves my mind
I look upon it with fresh eyes
It doesn’t resemble what it was
I’m torn on whether or not I love what it’s become
Or hate that it’s defied my initial direction
The curser blinks steadily
My fingers caress the keys awaiting to strike
The end
Finished
Time to dissect again
Reshape, remold
Its change only recognizable to me
Only time will tell what comes out of this
And then tomorrow I’ll start all over
A new blank page
Waiting to be filled 



https://supposedcrimes.com/products/loosed-lipped-secrets-and-twinkling-lights



Poetry Samples

I had posted these recently but I wanted to put them all together. I've already talked about these books a couple of posts back so I'm not gonna bore you with details. Here are selected few from each of my three volumes of poetry.

Gun Control for Polar Bears

8.

What is the coal that fuels us?
The match that sparks our anger
We're a large locomotive with millions of cars
That love to derail
The heat, the passion
Fuels such a train
Be it hate, anger, both
It pushes, it chugs
A destination reached
But we've lost more than a few cars


20.

The star fell that night
The campers saw
They wished
And so they caught every fish
There was to catch
The deer wished
And so the hunters lost their ammo
The bears saw it too
They also wished
And so the campers went to sleep
And left the coolers of fresh fish
Unattended


52. 

She took a hit of acid
Not too long ago
The carpet began to crawl
It spread up the walls
Reaching the ceiling
Encompassing everything with carpet
Furniture, clothes, appliances, everything
Every move, every step, was one in rug burn
The carpet grew taller
Then the knock at the door
If she could find it
It was him
The neighbor from across the hall
He's returned her lawn mower
Just in time


69.

The mailman is armed
Girl scouts are packing
The bag boy at the local grocery has a pipe bomb at home
The school janitor has a knife in his boot
The librarian has pepper spray on her desk
Bank tellers have their finger on the trigger beneath the counter
The bouncer has brass knuckles
The babysitter is strapping
And the coach has a nightstick
Though we've tried
We're still a violent nation
And though we've come a long way
The paranoid state in which we were raised in
Has left us a nation of arms
And not a nation of rational thought
It's not that we're concerned about protection
We're concerned about the thought
Entertaining the mere idea that something could happen
Fear
Artificial fear

https://supposedcrimes.com/collections/poetry/products/gun-control-for-polar-bears


Reflections at Various Speeds

No One Sees

Love me
Hate me
Fake me
Put me away
No one sees me
No one sees
Cut me
Burn me
Kill me
Keep me away
No one sees me
No one sees


My Kiss

My kiss isn't fair
I use it against her
When her claws come out and her barbs come at me
My lips are my shield and sword
My kiss is a warning
That it indeed may be the last
For if my presence is no longer requested and my leave is required
My lips will give her a history of our emotions in one solitary kiss
My kiss is an outburst
Sexually grasping at straws so she won't feel how scared I am
I hide behind my lips and countless apologies
Afraid of the end I try to avoid with kisses
My kiss...
Isn't a kiss without her


Parted

It's like an emotional terminator
No one knows where it started
It's like a crowded elevator
No one knows who farted
And it's like an escalator
One up, one down - we've parted
It's like a burning desire
No one knows what sparked it
It's like a blazing fire
Someone must have started
And it's like an escalator
One up, one down - we've parted
Like a sunny day
The clouds have sorted
The love of your life
A love less courted
And the world's an escalator
Eventually - we're parted

https://supposedcrimes.com/collections/poetry/products/reflections-at-various-speeds


Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights

The Animals

Where are we
On the food chain
We keep animals in cages
And people in boxes
We give ourselves free reign
While handing out limitations
The food we eat
Must pass societal inspection
The current diet craze online
The ones we love
Must pass government code
Only legal affection required
The things we fight for
Are only allotted
We win what we're allowed
And lose what was rightfully ours
We complain
And call it fighting back
We're stepped on daily
But we're so used to the pressure
We call it life
How did we get here
We live like paupers
But are still royalty compared to others
Kings and Queens
Of our own boxes
We sentence others
While serving, ourselves
We preach love and equality
But act on hatred and fear
Build walls, burn bridges
High talk, low action
Why the animals have not taken over
I have no idea
Perhaps they're complacent too


The Reptile Bar

Textile reptiles
Drinking lager at the bar
The lizard orders two
One for it and one for its tail
The crocodile orders dinosaur crude ale
Pours some out for his ancestors
The snake coils around its glass
Flicking its tongue into the drink
The turtles returns to his shell
When it's had too much to drink
The frog orders with a side of flies
It's turned away
No amphibians allowed
The lizards call for more brew
And do shots off the turtle's shell
The snakes release their grip on their glass
And order another
Salamanders walk by and rethink entering
The crocodile conjures up old reptilian drinking songs
The bar breaks out into chorus
Drinks flow and the scaly be merry
The Reptile Bar is open till winter


These Hands

My mind is a wonderland
But my hands are too conservative
I try to paint the picture
But the words have set their footing
I need to break free
Bound
To these chains I've dressed myself with
I can't move freely
My mind has a wall around it
If I can just get over it
Perhaps I need to dig down
And go under
My mind is a zoo
That wishes to be set free
But the gatekeepers stay
Fear of rejection
Fear of failure
I dip my brush in the letters
And paint
I hate it
Too streamline
Too white bread
These damn hands
I need to sync
My mind is a carnival
But I'm not allowed on any of the rides
And I'm not allowed out
S.O.S.
I'd cut off my hands
Defeat my gatekeepers
But no picture would be painted
Frustration rising
When will I be free?


2.0

Give away all your possessions
Cleanse yourself
And order more
Cut yourself off from friends
And family
And search for replacements online
Toss out your beliefs
And share someone else's
Don't speak to others
But like their posts
Change your name
Come up with something eye-catching
And controversial
Stop using your voice
Type faster
Using numbers instead of letters
Peel your skin off
Head to toe
And download more
If you're still you
You're doing it wrong

https://supposedcrimes.com/collections/poetry/products/loosed-lipped-secrets-and-twinkling-lights






Saturday, July 11, 2020

The First 10: Self-Published

Agent Phoenix marks my 10th book so I'm looking back at the first 10. Today: the self-published work.

I was fortunate enough to be published before having to self-publish, but with everything I was coming up with, I knew I'd end up doing so. To date I've self-published five books. Half of the first ten was with publisher Supposed Crimes and the other half were released through Amazon. My self-published work was really run-and-gun, write and release. All of them are cheap, and free for Kindle Unlimited.

Sharp Items & Bad Intentions (2017) started as three separate horror screenplays. I'd written them but couldn't get any traction. My scripts at the time were poorly written and over-detailed. At this point any time I'd tried to write a short story, it would end up sitting unfinished. Looking at these scripts with big blocks of prose, it occurred to me that maybe I could do it now. But maybe I can transfer these into stories and make a horror anthology.

So that's what I did. I took three of my screenplays that I felt would go well together: The Slit, All in a Day's Work, and Big Prizes. They were all three slashers and I felt they'd fill a slasher anthology. So, I went through and stripped them of their script format and transferred everything to three lengthy stories. The transfers were really barebones with nothing really rewritten to match that of typical stories. These stories are raw, bloody, indie horror. Sleazy and trashy as well.

The Slit started off as a film I was actually hoping to film, but of course, that wasn't meant to be. All in a Day's Work was my coping with being unjustly fired from my job at the time. Big Prizes was another one like Slit where I'd hoped to film it myself. Along with others, these three nasty, gory scripts sat around on my computer until I started transferring them and putting them together as Sharp Items & Bad Intentions.

$.99 Kindle e-book and $4.99 paperback.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B075TJ6YY7/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tkin_p1_i1


Beyond the Wall (2017) was Sharp Items' sister book. Like Sharp Items, Beyond the Wall started as a horror screenplay. But unlike that book, Beyond the Wall was one script, a horror anthology like those that I grew up with. There was only one story that was separate that was incorporated in the shuffle. Some of the stories came from dreams I'd had, others were old short story ideas that I'd written into the script format - only to transfer the Beyond the Wall screenplay into this little book.

I love horror anthologies. You get different kinds of horror in one piece. Like Sharp Items & Bad Intentions, Beyond the Wall is bloody as all hell. These were both written back-to-back, or transferred back-to-back rather. As said, it was real run and gun. Beyond the Wall wasn't one I was planning on making myself as I would probably never have the money to do so.

Transferring these to story form was taxing especially for someone who wasn't that kind of writer at that time. My first novel Last Rites of the Capacitance was written in a similar fashion but it didn't start off as a script like these did. These two were released before that book. The covers, like the covers to all my self-published works, are real bare and minimalist.

$.99 Kindle e-book and $4.99 paperback.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B076W3Q54Y/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tkin_p1_i5


Duo de Macabre (2018) I don't consider as a separate writing, just an extra in the ten. Duo de Macabre is both Sharp Items & Bad Intentions and Beyond the Wall together in one. My lovely Aunt Wanda had edited the two when they were released. She helped make them palatable. But over time, I was looking at the format of them and realized I wanted something tighter. Both were small books and so I had the thought of giving them a tighter format, another quick edit, and then put them together in one indie horror collection.

Someday I may go back and rewrite it all to more like I've come to write today, but I'm a bit swamped at the moment. I look back at these fondly as a struggling writer trying to find his voice, and the horror kid loving the creativity and mayhem. You could buy them both separate or just buy this one volume and have both together.

$.99 Kindle e-book and $7.00 paperback.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07BZYJGGV/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_taft_p1_i0


Doomsday Think Tank (2018) is a conspiracy theorist play. It started from a deleted scene from a comic book I work on with Dennis Magnant called Tourniquet. In the comic, the team of monster heroes rescue a man with a microchip in his possession and I wrote a scene which the lead characters discuss what could've been on the chip. They sat around a table throwing theories back and forth. The scene wasn't working for the book but I was still loving it as I was coming up with more theories. I copy and pasted the conversation into a blank document and it continued to grow.

I'd be working on other projects and periodically go back to my conspiracy theory conversation and add more to it. It just kept growing! As I was writing on it, I started to see it as a stage play. Writing plays was always part of the plan but was for when I was older. But life is what happens when you're planning for the future. Eventually I dubbed it Doomsday Think Tank and started writing it more seriously as a play. Like my scrappy horror work, my aunt edited it and quickly saw how it kept growing as questions "What about...?" and "What if...?" arose every other line.

The story was now that a mysterious disc was picked up by the pentagon and four conspiracy theorists come together to weigh in on what it could mean. If you're into conspiracy theories or conversation/dialogue pieces, I think you'd like Doomsday Think Tank. It's another one I may rewrite someday. I've never heard it performed and long to someday hear a table reading of it. It would be a cost efficient play to put on, just four actors and a table. I aim to write more plays as soon as I get an open window to do so.

$.99 Kindle e-book and $7.00 paperback.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07B7CMN3M/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_taft_p1_i6


Blue Sweep (2018) was my second novel and it couldn't have been more different than my first. While Last Rites of the Capacitance was very sci-fi and written in a different style, Blue Sweep was a work of literary fiction written in a more traditional style. Being in an interracial marriage, my wife and I will often discuss race in politics and the like. For a long time, she'd send me countless articles about cops killing unarmed civilians. It went from sad to just angering me. Blue Sweep was born of two thoughts: 1, I had stated that if the cops aren't careful, it's going to go too far and there's going to be an uprising calling open season on all police officers. And 2, I had thought of how I would react being the parent of one of the slain.

The two thoughts, along with the barrage of articles being sent to me, collided as I put my fingers to the keys. Writing Blue Sweep, I was focused. It was one of the rare times I wasn't writing multiple projects as my main focus was on it. I saw the format in my head and where it was going. When a young black woman is killed by police, her father's revenge sparks a nationwide uprising. Blue Sweep juggles multiple storylines involving police brutality and police murders. The only person to date to have read this book is my wife. Regardless of no readers, I couldn't be more proud of this book. It's my only real-life story as I mainly work in horror and science fiction, etc.

I recently unpublished the novel to give it a fresh edit and a new cover. It will be rereleased later this year and hopefully someone will read it. I have to admit my surprise that it went unread for so long seeing as it's timely subject matter. After the murder of George Floyd and the extreme protests, my wife showed me the article and asked if it sounded familiar - it did, I wrote it. Written mainly in 2017 and finished in 2018, Blue Sweep sees the average citizen fighting back against the police. Again, nobody read the book. Years later, people finally start fighting back and all we could think of at our house was how strange it was. Art imitates life imitates art, regardless if it's seen or not. As people are waking up and realizing there are more of us than police and fighting back in their own ways, I'm curious as to how much of the book will come true.


How to Sell Sunblock to a Vampire (2018) is a writing sampler platter. I wanted to release an eclectic mix of writing that would have a little bit of everything I dabble in. The title had been with me for some time. Everything in this collection was at one point on this blog. I had some poetry - not enough for a full book and it was too late to add them to the books already out - that I'd written in my stay at the hospital when I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. I'd also had some short stories, mainly horror and just all around weird. I'd written some short screenplays, ranging from humor to drama. Sitting around were a few comic book scripts that never found a home.

All of this stuff was separate until the thought to make such a varied collection came to me. It sounded fun; I know if more writers did books like these I'd buy 'em up. It's one of the only books of mine I have no mind to rewrite. It's got poetry, short stories, comic book scripts, screenplays, and notes on the craft. I'm proud of every book I've written but this one holds a special place in my heart because it's the only one I've done like it, and I don't know too many other books like it. I could see me doing another one of these, I have the material, but this one was never read so I'm not sure.

How to Sell Sunblock to a Vampire was like a home for lost work, pieces that didn't have a home. This book is a good place to start if you're wanting to check out my work.

$.99 Kindle e-book and $7.00 paperback.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1980965064/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_taft_p1_i11


That concludes looking back at my first 10. I had a lot released in those two years ('17 & '18), between Supposed Crimes and self-publishing. I will be self-publishing another book very soon - a horror anthology I wrote with my wife in 2015/2016. As said, I will also be rereleasing Blue Sweep later in the year. One of the great things about writing and releasing so much in a short time is getting to see the growth in the craft. Now and then I'll go back and look at my old stuff, self published and traditionally published, and I can see it. It makes me happy and hopeful that someday I'll look at this new stuff I'm cooking up with the same growth.


Thursday, July 9, 2020

The First 10: With Supposed Crimes

As I'm working on a new batch of projects, I wanted to stop and look back at what's been released since I started this journey. Agent Phoenix marks my tenth book released -- five from Supposed Crimes and five self-published. Today I'm going to focus on my work with Supposed Crimes.

As I've stated before, writing books wasn't part of the plan, but for the last five years it's all I've been doing, and loving every minute of it. I started with poetry and then tried my hand at novels and was hooked.

/The Poetry/

Gun Control for Polar Bears (2016) was my first book. It was a poetry book that I'd had sitting in random papers and on my computer for a little while. I'd read some to my wife periodically. As I was struggling with writing and sending out work and getting nowhere, my wife, Anchanie, suggested I send out my poetry. I honestly didn't think anyone would be interested. I figured if I was ever going to do a poetry book, I'd probably self-publish it, print some copies, and that's it.

I sent out what I'd titled Gun Control for Polar Bears - a title that doesn't mean anything, it was just the pattern of words that had come to me. Got a lot of rejections, which I was used to by that point. Interestingly enough, most of the rejections came with "I love that title though!" I got an email from Supposed Crimes LLC owner/publisher/author Christy Case. I expected another rejection upon opening it. It turned out that she loved the poetry and wanted to publish it. I had to read it again. No one had ever told me Yes before regarding my work. I thought on it for about a day, maybe less than, and her and I went back and forth shortly. Shortly after, I was signing a contract. This was all in 2015, the book to be released the following year.

Holding the book when my copies arrived was wild. We'd created this thing that didn't exist before, and it wasn't just another idea of mine or another unfinished project sitting around; it was real, physical. It probably sounds stupid to gush over but, after struggling to even be read, it was like water in the desert.

https://supposedcrimes.com/products/gun-control-for-polar-bears


Reflections at Various Speeds (2017) was my second volume of poetry and third book to be released from Supposed Crimes. While writing my first novel, and addicted to that feeling after getting my first book, I remembered that I had another poetry book. This one was older, scrappier. In my younger days, film and music was the goal. I wrote a lot of lyrics and saved them. I had always intended on releasing the lyrics with art pieces and make more of an art/poetry book out of it. Well, like a lot of my stuff, it sat there. I had, at different times, artists attached to the project but they all had bailed on it.

I asked Christy if she'd be interested in another poetry book, and she said yes. I polished up the stack of lyrics and random poetry pieces, and added a few new pieces here and there. Again, this stuff is older than Gun Control for Polar Bears. It's rough and there's not a set style in the pieces. While I've had input in all my covers, I actually did this cover myself. Minimalist and scrappy, like the book. Reflections at Various Speeds was another title that'd just come to me. Other poetry book titles I had were things like Freebasing Sugar at High Velocities, and Green Lollipops Give You Special Powers. Wil they ever be used? Doubt it, but it's nice to dream.

The release of this book felt like closure in a lot of ways. I love it, and it was one of the last books my dad read before his passing, expressing his love for the piece "Crowded House of Sin." It was released a month after my novel Last Rites of the Capacitance.

https://supposedcrimes.com/products/reflections-at-various-speeds


Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights (2019) was an interesting collection, my third volume of poetry. This had a few old pieces but was comprised of mainly new stuff. A lot of it was experimentation of the craft, stretching, seeing what I can do with words here and there. Before actually starting this book, I looked over some old pieces and gave them a quick rewrite before starting more.

Upon starting it, I was working on Agent Phoenix and various other little projects. As Agent Phoenix was giving me trouble, I needed something else to put myself into, and thought I could do a poetry book rather quickly. I couldn't. I couldn't pull a poetry book out of my ass. I did one piece in the style that I work in and realized I couldn't do it. I still left that piece in, if you can name it there should probably be a prize. This became a difficult write as I dug deep and poured myself out on the page.

See, just before starting this book, my dad passed away. There aren't a whole lot of pieces about him in this book, but dealing with his death opened me up to more that I was going through. Like my other poetry, there are story-type bits, emotional outcries, and things about life and humanity in general. I can honestly say this is my best poetry work. I love them all but as far as craft goes, with this book, I'm getting closer to something I see in my head.

https://supposedcrimes.com/products/loosed-lipped-secrets-and-twinkling-lights


/The Novels/

Last Rites of the Capacitance (2017) was my first novel. I couldn't be more proud of this book. While we were working things out for the release of Gun Control for Polar Bears, I'd seen on the Supposed Crimes website a call for submissions "Sci-fi as hard as ice." I love me some hard science fiction but A) I didn't think I was good enough or SMART enough to write hard sci-fi, and B) I'd never written a novel before, that's crazy. I figured, if I was horrible, I'd just hang it up.

I had a couple of ideas that interested me so I put them together and began shaping my sci-fi book. I'd throw ideas at Christy as I was working on it. She was nothing but encouraging. To say I was green is an understatement, but she never made me feel like I was out of my element, and pushed me to explore my potential as a writer. You don't write your first novel once, you write it many times until it's right, and this book was no exception. It went through multiple drafts, working through different styles until finally settling on all of them. It's a smorgasbord of science fiction, horror, and drama with bits of humor and action.

The amount of horror in it wasn't intentional, I just grew up a horror kid and it was ingrained in me. Starting to write a novel for the first time was exciting, scary, and even a bit overwhelming. I didn't really know how to go about it, so I used the writing skills I had and started, so it has a film-like feel to it. I wasn't used to writing in the literary fiction format, but writing scripts so that was used as my base. From there, Christy Case and I shaped that book into what it is today. She was patient with me and I eventually came out of my shell. I still remember the process and all that went involved and someday I'll go into it in full detail for anyone who might be interested.

https://supposedcrimes.com/products/last-rites-of-the-capacitance


Agent Phoenix (2020) was my third novel, second with Supposed Crimes. Unlike other projects, I didn't actually tell Christy or anyone about this. I was going through a tough time. My second novel (self-published) opened to crickets and I couldn't get anyone to read it. I stopped pumping out self-published works and started work on new stuff, stuff that surely someone would want to read. I was working on two science fiction novels together. They were both heavy with lots of moving parts. I grew more and more depressed every time I sat down to work on them.

I finally needed to put them away for the time being. I wanted to write something light and fun, but more importantly I wanted to write something fast. I'd always heard stories of authors cranking out a fast piece of work and I wanted to do that. I don't know if it was just to write something and get it out of my system or what. I needed a cleanser project from the heaviness I'd been working on. So I came up with a pulpy adventure story called Agent Phoenix. The idea was simple, putting the focus on visuals and action. I didn't want anything heavy, keeping it light and fast-paced.

I found out early on in Agent Phoenix that I could not write something fast. Like the poetry book Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights I tried to rush, I found I couldn't 'crank' anything out. The more I tried to hurry it along, the more the book made me slow down and look at everything - how the sentences were constructed, how I wanted it to come across. Agent Phoenix changed how I wrote and made me pay closer attention. The things I've been writing since completing it are much different but it's because of this book in a weird way. Agent Phoenix is a 180 from Last Rites of the Capacitance. Instead of darkness, everything's lit with bright flashy neon; and instead of heavy issues and horror, it's light and positive.

To write it, I pulled inspiration from comic books and TV shows such as The Flash. Agent Phoenix is basically a superhero book without stating as much. I turned it in and she really dug it so it was off to the races. Agent Phoenix is my 3rd novel, 5th book with Supposed Crimes, and my 10th book to be released. It was mainly written in 2018 and finished and turned in 2019. The writing of it was frustrating but it was in the middle of writing this one that dad had died and that complicated things further, but I eventually, using work to cope with grief, went back to it.

https://supposedcrimes.com/products/agent-phoenix


I have a lot of great things lined up with Supposed Crimes and hope to continue to work with them in the future. I love working with them. There's so much freedom and encouragement. The moment we were done with the edits for Last Rites of the Capacitance, it was like my mind exploded with so many ideas to write for them. The only real issue was, I wasn't good enough for those ideas yet. I had great ideas but I wasn't at the level to give them what they needed. As I've been working on more, and varied, projects, I've been getting better and feeling better and more confident in my craft. The first ten have been a great learning experience. The stuff beyond Agent Phoenix is on another level. I'm not bragging, not at all, I'm just happy to be seeing growth. Of course, I also hope to see growth in the number of readers, but as with most things, time will tell.

Well this has been the first part of The First 10, the Supposed Crimes 5. Tomorrow, I'll go over my self-published works. I hope you check out my work with Supposed Crimes and I hope you check out the other amazing authors they have on their roster. I see and read the titles and honestly wonder why more people haven't heard of the company or given their works a chance. It's great, I assure you, start reading!

www.SupposedCrimes.com




Wednesday, July 1, 2020

The ABC Method


Often times when I'm writing, I apply the ABC Method. Where you are is A, where you want to go is C, and how to get there is B. It's simple, stupidly so, but it works when you get flustered - and I know you get flustered. Sometimes when I'm working on a project I'll get lost in it momentarily and I'll get a bit overwhelmed. I have to stop and step back. A lot of times, this is when I apply this method. I'll say, "Okay, my lead is in bed, peaceful and sound. No current conflict. How can they interrupt a convenience store robbery?" There's my A and C. My MC's life is normal and I know the complications that are coming but getting to the jumpoff point is the B-line I need to figure out. "Okay.... After a waking yawn, they rubbed their eyes and reached for their morning cigarette. The pack was light, too light. The investigation didn't last long as the pack was found empty. They groaned and got up to get dressed. There was a gas station on the corner. They could walk down and get a pack, and maybe even a cup of coffee. After grabbing their keys and money, they left." And there's my B.

It can be long-term or short-term.

It can be, "My A is on a train with a bomb on a bridge, and my C is getting to the caboose. What's my B? It more than likely involves collecting my party, get through the panicked mob, etc."

Or it can be, "I want my A to start off a poverty stricken male, and my C to have them become a female and Queen of a civilization. How would I start my B?"

It's simple and it works when it's used right. It gives you a concise goal. I'm Here and I need to get There, How? More often than not, it is Not a straight line and there are usually many steps involved in B. It depends on your short-term or long-term. What do you want to do? When your long-term B is figured out, you can use the same method for short-term next. "Alright, I know where I want to go but damn it's big and that's a lot of work.... Okay, what's my first step, I'm at A, the princess is locked in the castle with a dragon standing guard. The next step I want to make is C, get to the castle to face the dragon. But then there's B which involves the journey, going through haunted swamps and dodging ravenous drifters."

Then again, it can also be, “The lead is handcuffed to a chair, A. They need to get out before the captors come back, C. What’s B? They pick the lock.”

The ABC Method: simple but don't count it out for it's simplicity.

Wednesday, June 17, 2020

Update

I’ve got great news that I can’t really talk about at the moment but I’ve never been busier. My workload has gone from four to three to six projects. I put a pin in my rotation, just briefly to tend to a few things. 

One is a weird ass horror anthology that I co-wrote with my wife some time ago - title to be revealed closer to time of release. It was originally written after my first horror anthologies (Sharp Items & Bad Intentions and Beyond the Wall) and before my first novel (Last Rites of the Capacitance). So it was pretty early and I’ve been rewriting it to make it cohesive and palatable and everything else that it rarely is when one is first starting out. It’s coming along though and I just have the ending to go and then I’ll probably get working on the cover, and from there the release. What I can say about it is it ranges to different types of horror. 

The second of the three that popped up is a relaunch of Blue Sweep. As I stated in my last post, I’ve unpublished it in order to make way for a tighter vision. I cut the first chapter and it flows much better. I’ve been going through rereading it and giving little edits. I’m more than happy with it. Its cover has always been barebones with blue text over black, but now thanks to artist Dennis Magnant, Blue Sweep will have an actual cover. So I’m really excited about that. Maybe I can get someone to read it. You’d be the first other than my wife. 

I’m planning on releasing the anthology first but we’ll just see how things go. 

The third came about pretty organically. Years ago Dennis and I made a comic book called Tourniquet. Tourniquet died a quiet death and we’d talk about how we’d do it differently now. The book was in black and white and dialogue heavy, we decided to go a different route. Dennis colored the book. He’s handling art and coloring and I’m handling the writing and lettering. As we discussed Blue Sweep’s new cover, we talked about Tourniquet. Within a few exchanges we found our new direction. The pages I’ve done thus far have turned out great so we’re stoked. It’ll be released as a digital comic sometime this year.

And when I’m done with those three, I need to jump back in my rotation. I’m about halfway done rewriting my zombie book, my vampire book knows what it wants to be now, and my Christian murder mystery is rolling along well. I can’t wait to get back to them. Rewriting the horror anthology has been good for me; not just for my craft (it’s been a great exercise) but personally as well. There’s a certain feeling of closure about it. I’m ecstatic that Blue Sweep might actually get a chance to live. Tourniquet feels like the anthology, like finally finishing something. Maybe I needed to clean out the attic before I could give my all to these. Regardless, writing all this is a daunting task but it’s great, it is. I love writing. I love creating. It’s been very teaching, going back to rewrite and edit old stuff. All this work means my vacation continues to be put off but it’ll come. 

Alright, that’s enough rambling. A lot of big things on the horizon, so stay tuned. 
Goodnight.

Friday, June 12, 2020

Goodbye, Blue Sweep, we hardly knew ye

I have officially unpublished my second novel Blue Sweep. Written in 2017/2018, Blue Sweep was my answer to the constant police brutality and police murders. A young black woman is killed by the police and her father's revenge sparks a nationwide event where people band together and fight back against the police. It's brutal and violent and takes on the country's racial tension. Blue Sweep was meant as a warning: that if the police keep it up (killing innocent people) eventually it would be open season on cops.

When the violent protests broke out after the killing of George Floyd, my wife showed me the articles and asked if it sounded familiar. I wrote this uprising. However, nobody's read Blue Sweep. I'm pulling it to give it an edit and a new cover (it's cover was the barest of bones). Blue Sweep will return later this year and hopefully someone will pick it up.

One of the main changes will be the dropping of the first chapter, the introduction. The story begins in chapter two and I want to start right with the story. So, here is the original chapter one/introduction for all to read.
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Police Exonerated in the Death of Young Man

Family Searches for Answers in the Death of their Son

Police Department Investigated Over Death of Twelve Year Old

Riots Break Out Over Police Shootings

Police Related Death Count Rises

Police Departments Claim Race Not a Factor in Accidental Shootings

“I Feared for My Life” The Police’s New Excuse

Black Lives Matter Countered by Blue Lives Matter Movement

Man Killed by Police Unarmed

Shooting of Fifteen Year Old Raises Awareness

Stray Bullets Kill Young Girl

Questions Unanswered in Recent Wave of Shootings

Riots Erupt as Officer Not Indicted

Unidentified Man Shot Down by Police

Officers Involved in Shooting Acquitted

Wrong Man Killed by Police in Robbery

Protesters Hosed at Rally

Man Shot Seven Times Unarmed

Police Officer Suspended After the Killing of a Mother and Her Two Children

Three Killed in Protest for Equal Rights

Groom Killed at Wedding





An epidemic was growing. Festering for years. A plague resulting in a deadly combination of hatred, power, and a total disregard for human life. Us and them, while one realized their place on the food chain and acted, the other forgot their place and became complacent in the national fear.

1,113 were reported killed by the police in 2014.

1,216 in 2015.

1,162 in 2016.

New Year’s Day of 2017 was met with five killings alone. By July, the number of people killed by police for the year had risen to over six hundred. Of course, all of these are just the cases reported; just as not every death is reported, not every killer is found. While some of the victims’ families were given various sums of money for their anguish, others weren’t granted anything but loss. Regardless, the officers involved were rarely reprimanded beyond a suspension. It appeared to be the running routine: murder, slap on the wrist, payout, and sweep under the rug, repeat.

The rift was often seen as overanalyzed and over-speculated with points of view from two biased parties. In the early days of the reports, when the numbers began stacking up, they were seen by many as purely coincidental and those who identify as patriots strongly voiced the reports as a smear campaign against the police force. But, as time went on, the body count rose and it was becoming harder to chock up to accidents or coincidence. The bias on both sides of the line remained, only stronger in their opinions.

The argument for most citizens was that of Murder vs Police Action. It was a fine line that was being blurred by the minute. A line that had been seen before. Though the Vietnam War was called such, many still refer to it as a police action and not actually a sanctioned war. But much like the question ‘At what point does a police action become a war?’ people asked ‘At what point does it go from a matter of law enforcement to murder?’ Some people spoke up saying that “We need to call the killers what they are regardless of their vocation.” Others disregarded it in support of the police saying, “They’re just doing their jobs.” Much like the Vietnam War, the rising death rate was met with people arguing the morals of the actions and others standing by the side of the law, claiming their importance to liberty.

At first, most deaths were regarded by officials as accidents while their more recent excuses such as the popular “I feared for my life” and “I felt threatened” were used, regardless if the person in question was armed. When the first steady wave of deaths were reported, departments acted shocked and talked eagerly of investigating the matters. Most of which were thrown out with various excuses, if one was given in the first place. Police departments issued statements that their officers would undergo new firearm safety training and reassess the excessive use of weapons but, after more killings, mentions of such changes had ceased. The chaos from one death was quickly overshadowed by the next and so forth.

Despite the departments’ claims that race wasn’t a factor, the casualties of unarmed people of color continued to rise from the few years prior. Though the black community weren’t the only ones affected by it, they continued to be profiled and stalked by the boys in blue. Departments denied having any racist officers in their employ. Some went as far as pointing out Hispanic and African-American officers on the force, fighting alongside their white brethren. It appeased some people, while others saw it as the old cliché heard from racists: “I’m not racist. Some of my best friends are black.”

Officers went through the academy and took the vow to uphold the law and to serve and protect, but how would these department heads know the moral codes and beliefs of each individual officer? This was a question on a lot of American minds.

Protest rallies were held regularly, demanding justice for the fallen members of the community. Money wasn’t nearly enough for the families of the dead. They wanted justice. They wanted the guilty to be tried as such. The people of America wanted their loved ones' killers to be tried as any other killer would be, citing an obvious 'special treatment' when it came to the law. People demanded answers. Why was my son killed? Why was my baby taken away from me? Why are they not here anymore? When will it stop? What do the police want? When will they be held accountable for their actions? How could you feel threatened by an unarmed person? Why are all the children dying?

Police supporters called the protesters “Un-American” and claimed they should be “arrested for obstruction of justice” as they soon formed counter protests. They argued that being a police officer is a hard job and they’re just trying to help. Supporters were as passionate as the opposition and fights broke out from arguments in the comment sections online to fist fights in the street at otherwise peaceful protests. Many protesters compared every police related death without thinking about how casualties are expected in such a dangerous job. One thing the supporters of law enforcement failed to really understand, however, was how each death had destroyed a family. With the death rate growing, thousands of families were affected every year. The fighting between citizens would give the police a break…until the next person was killed.

While the deaths rocked communities, many didn’t believe the media hype. Whether they ignored it or chose not to believe it, looking the other way mimicked the reaction to reports of the use of concentration camps in Germany in the thirties and forties. To some civilians, it was mere hearsay while, to others, it was just another sad news story on top of the nightly broadcast. There were no camps or numbering, however, in the modern day American holocaust; civilians of color as well as civilians of lower classes were killed on site. Coincidentally, cops began stopping people at random, asking for their identification without reason beyond personal interest not unlike what was happening in Germany at that time. The division between police and civilian had grown wider into the ‘us and them’ mentality. When it was said that they were abusing the power they held, your average neighbor would claim that the reports themselves gave the police too much credit, and thus, too much power. The culprits in question, users of unwarranted deadly force, were more often than not white male police officers.

Though some not directly affected joined in the fight for justice, most wouldn’t act or even acknowledge the problem until it was at their doorstep.

Many black officers wanted to speak up about the injustices they’d seen on the force but feared for their lives over breaking the Blue Wall Code of Silence. Some were reportedly harassed for attempting to speak out. The safety of them and their families' lives were threatened. Supporters blew them off, claiming them to be nothing more than opportunists attempting to kick white police while they’re down and appealing to the African-American community. Like civilians, the voices of those officers were silenced.

The social climate had become tense. People called police to help while simultaneously questioning their presence and actions. A new fear was instilled on the youth, almost more prevalent to the black youth. It became apparent that just walking down the street was as dangerous as being caught in a traffic stop. Wrong place, any time. Parents feared for their children’s lives, not taking into account that those of age and older were also being killed. Drivers tensed as police cruisers drove behind them, sometimes for uncomfortably long distances. It became common practice to throw your hands up in a ‘don’t shoot’ fashion when an officer became even slightly agitated. Of course, it didn’t help allegations when police would keep a hand on their gun during even the most benign calls.

The total of casualties from those few years almost rival the amount of American soldiers killed in Iraq (4,486). Fallen soldiers were given monuments while victims of police received a paycheck. Those dying in-country weren’t trained soldiers fighting for freedom, they were civilians trying to live. Modern Day America was reinforcing itself with some of the worst traits of past wars.

The fabric of society is much like a broken windshield: it starts with a chip, then it cracks, then the crack spreads until finally it bottoms out. The abuse of power has always been the chip and the families destroyed as a result are the crack that spider-webs outward. It’s only a matter of time before society bottoms out.

A portion of Americans stopped calling the police altogether for fear of what would happen to them when they’d arrive. Blue Fear had infected America. Newspapers, internet news sites, TV, and radio stations all distributed the reports laced with such a fear. Few would fight back and were labeled criminals and terrorists as the average citizen doesn’t know the difference between action and reaction, especially since the media often tells one side of the story. Reports on cases showed one of two sides: One vilifying the police and one showing support for a policeman being caught up in such a no-win situation.

Those oppressed became enraged and fought back in their own way while still trying to stay in the confines of the law. Action vs Reaction, the difference between an outstretched palm holding people down and a tightly-balled fist fighting back against it.

Police supporters and self-proclaimed patriots argued the innocence of those killed by law enforcers but the question of the matter wasn’t about innocence – something often subjective in the eyes of the court – but was about whether or not such forces were needed for unarmed individuals. Whether or not those killed were guilty of breaking the law at any time had nothing to do with law enforcement making the decision to be executioners. Guilty or innocent, sadly, the killings that continued to take place held no actual merit. Not all police officers took part in the executions but those that did had tainted the valiant image of justice for a large portion of the country. Much like the good cops that were lumped in with bad cops, everyday citizens were lumped in with criminals which often resulted in untimely deaths.

Victims’ loved ones have had to carry their tragedy with them everywhere they go. It’s tattooed on them: the loss, the anguish, the questions, the anger. Citizens across the country now have large, deep holes in their lives – empty voids where someone close used to reside. In all the unnecessary deaths over the years, the police still remain unremorseful. Some families carried their tragedy with them while others were unknowingly waiting for theirs, not knowing how they would react if what happened to the poor devastated people on the news happened to them. No one is immune.
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Blue Sweep will return either fall or winter of 2020.

Monday, May 18, 2020

In Rotation



Last week I talked about Running the Gauntlet, a writing exercise where I run through many of my files adding little bits. Now I want to talk about what happens after the gauntlet – In Rotation.



I wasn’t always so organized or ‘strict’ about writing. I was always a little loose about it, writing on projects here and there. Before, I’d work on things at random until one came into focus. Things started changing after the last time I’d run the gauntlet of stories. For a while, I was writing and releasing work back to back, but then I hit a point where there were two books in the pipeline (Agent Phoenix, Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights) but nothing else really to be focused on.



I’d run the gauntlet again but had a couple of ideas I had just come up with. I’d initially put them on the backburner thinking I wasn’t ready to do them. I’ll often put things off if I don’t feel I’m good enough for them yet. But then I thought, why not, and jumped in headfirst. I started working on two projects: a horror novel for my publisher Supposed Crimes and a zombie book. At this point I wasn’t adding little bits to the stories but focused going back and forth between the two.



They were keeping up with each other for a while, but then I got another bee in my bonnet and added a third – a vampire story that had been started in different formats but now I was trying to make it into a novel. I now had 3 in rotation. The gauntlet was behind me and I was focusing on the three. I’d write a certain amount and then rotate to the next.



My wife and I had been kicking around a Christian murder mystery for some time. We’d created the setting and characters and story options but I hadn’t really gone into it. She suggested I start on it. I said, “I’ve already got three in rotation.” “Add a fourth.” She shrugged. I sat down and started it. I then had four in rotation and it’s been this way since late last year.



When I had started the rotation writing process it was August of 2019. It’s currently May 2020 and the first one is finished and with my publisher. My zombie book (book 2) is done but undergoing extensive rewrites, which is driving me bananas. The vampire book (No. 3) has had a drastic change to its original style and is finally coming together. The Christian mystery, the fourth in rotation, is rolling along smoothly.



I haven’t been back to the gauntlet in almost a year as I’ve had these four novels in rotation. When they’re ready I’ll go over the creation of each one. The process for the four is different for each one but there are similarities. The first two books were written closer together. I’d write three chapters on the first, rotate and write a section of the second, equaling to roughly the same page count. The third and forth books share a similar trait in how they will be shaped.



I’ve been pretty strict about the rotation. The lengths of writing time differ, however, but I’ll always have a stopping point. Sometimes the time to switch may seem premature but it’s for the best. The space of time between the books have helped the ideas flow as well as gives you a break when you get frustrated on a project. Although, I will say, writing four novels is burning me out. I’ve taken a couple of breaks, long weekends. But, damn, is it wearing on me. Still, I’m dedicated to getting the four done, and when they’re done, I will be taking a month off from writing ANYTHING. I can see that month in the distance. But for now, I’m getting back to work. I just finished over a month of writing on the Christian mystery and now I’m back to the beginning to the finished second book, only to chop it up. I rather like the rotation process but I don’t think I’ll be doing four novels together again. It’s a bit taxing.



I hope you all are staying safe.



Keep writing.

Friday, May 8, 2020

Running the Gauntlet

If you’re a writer like me, you’ve probably got a dozen stories in your head at any given time. For years I wrote on things at random. Rarely did I work on primarily one thing. I’d write on one project for a few pages, hit another, back to the other, then onto something new. There was no format and no structure; no method to the madness. After writing my first novel, I was elated. I had finally found an outlet for all these stories in my head. Prior to books I was writing things in mind for movies, music, and comics. Over time, managing my mess was an exercise.



I write on my phone a lot, then transfer it to my laptop where I’ll expand, format, and edit. Some projects I’ll write mainly on the laptop but I always end up doing some of it on my phone. I used to text pages and pages to myself. Sometimes full on pages of work, other times just notes. Things changed when my wife got me a new phone. I had changed from writing Agent Phoenix in text to writing it as a word document. Then the files grew with more stories and more notes.



After a while I had more than a dozen documents, not counting everything on the laptop. At this point, I had various pots and pans on the stove but was mainly focused on Agent Phoenix and Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights. When I wasn’t working on the novel and poetry book, respectively, I had just a growing file of documents. I ended up falling into a more organized version of my previous work method. I began running the gauntlet.



This is what I ended up calling it. I’d stay up late at night - the family’s asleep, the dogs are put up, time to work with no interruptions – and start at the first document. Very few of them even have names. Most are Blank 1, Blank 2, etc. etc. Actually, two of the Blanks have become finished novels; first drafts, of course. I’d go down the list adding at the very least a line to everything.



I ran the gauntlet for a long while as multiple books were growing slowly, until several came into focus and they were put into a rotation – but that’s for next week.



I suggest using this method. It helped me out a lot, really got me to focus and put in the work. I’m more focused on my craft than ever. Every project is different so it was like a literary workout.



Whether on your phone, laptop, computer, tablet, or whatever, gather your files together (not all, but a healthy amount), start at the first one and just write. And when you’ve felt you’ve said what you could or wanted to say, go to the next file and do the same. Then the third, and however more you have. If you have a lot, you probably won’t always make it through. Aim for at least a sentence. There are some stories I wrote a page or so on, while others were a struggle for that one sentence. It is a writing workout. It can be fun, it can be frustrating, but it helps.



Running the Gauntlet, a writing suggestion.

Monday, April 13, 2020

Writing with Multiple Sclerosis


I’ve been writing for as long as I can remember. I rarely finished anything. I’d quit short stories and scripts when I had gotten discouraged. Writing books was never really part of the plan. I’ve played music for years. I play multiple instruments but mainly bass, guitar, and keyboard. I’d also always had an interest in film. The only books I’d intended to write (someday) was a poetry book, an anthology of horror stories, and maybe a science fiction novel. For years I’d planned independent horror films as well as albums (electronic music and progressive stuff mainly).



I’d also been working on a number of screenplays. There was always something getting in the way whether it was lack of money or lack of helping hands. I worked nights in a factory for years and tried to create in my free time. I live to create. I’ve been drawing characters and writing story ideas/outlines since I could hold a pencil. With numerous projects, and working on them primarily alone, frustration was mounting and completion seemed impossible.



In January of 2013, I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. Doctors and I traced symptoms back to high school and perhaps even into childhood. I still tried to work on projects but the disease was progressing. Things were becoming clearer to me. Being completely solo and having no money, any hopes for a film to be made had to be put on the back burner indefinitely. Also, with my health in decline, I knew I wouldn’t be able to do what I’d aimed to do musically (actually playing live shows, etc.) I could still record but playing live with everything I got going on wouldn’t end well. Which sucks because I had some pretty good songs going.



I haven’t done much with film at all, just some minute shorts and things, but I still play music every now and then. I hope to someday release a bass album. I’ve had some electronic music on YouTube under the name Vestibular Blue. I think I’d like to get back to more electronic music, particularly Synthwave. Movies and music were eluding me, and with a busy work schedule and this disease, getting time to really commit to screenwriting eluded me as well. I began having troubles with my hands when I’d previously just had trouble in my legs. I was feeling frantic trying to find a project in which I didn’t have to rely on anyone else and something that my illness couldn’t hold me back from.



After losing my job, my wife suggested I work full time towards my goal of being a writer. She suggested I send the poetry I’d read to her out. I did and I got published by Supposed Crimes. From there I ended up writing my first novel and I was hooked. Writing books turned out to be what I was looking for. I can write whatever I want and not worry about a budget or other people to depend on. It just requires imagination, time, and work. The limitations of the disease brought me to writing books and refocused my writing and brought my attention to the craft.



It’s still hard. I have a lot of bad days. Some days I’m in too much pain, others my nerves are out of whack and I can’t focus on anything. But in the end, it seems as if Multiple Sclerosis led me to what I love doing most. Despite this debilitating disease, I’m writing more than ever, working towards a better life.



To date I’ve had five books with Supposed Crimes (3 poetry, 2 novels) and five self-published (1 novel, 1 play, and 3 collections). Everything was done and my career (slow going as it may be) started after my diagnosis. It slows me down but I haven’t let it stop me. Multiple Sclerosis tries to drag me down every day, but I keep fighting, and keep writing.



Writing with Multiple Sclerosis is like having a bipolar editor in your head, and hands that often seem to write whatever they want. Days of crippling depression and anxiety and pain. It’s a struggle, but I’m blessed to be able to fight. Many with the disease aren’t as lucky as myself, and I acknowledge that and am quick to remember when I’m going through hard times.



I was diagnosed seven years ago and just saw the release of my tenth book. Agent Phoenix is my third novel, and fifth project with Supposed Crimes. I’ve talked on here before about Book X and the future. I’ve thought before how nobody will know who I am until my tenth book; well, we shall see. Until then I’m going to keep shutting MS down and keep working.

Thursday, April 2, 2020

AGENT PHOENIX

It's finally here! Agent Phoenix is available as of April 1st, 2020!

Agent Phoenix  
Agent Phoenix has been a trip. It was written late 2018/early 2019 in spurts. It was a struggle, and a teachable write.

I'd become the stereotypical struggling writer. I felt like I was working my ass off but saw failure after failure. I drank too much, smoked too much, and beat myself up too much. I had just released a novel called Blue Sweep, and that book took me to some dark places. I poured myself into it until it hurt. Unable to find anyone to read it, let alone pick it up, I self-published it - mainly so I could have proof of its existence after all the mental anguish while writing it. I was currently writing a pair of science fiction novels. One planned for Supposed Crimes (publisher of my first novel as well as Agent Phoenix, and more), and the other to find a home somewhere else.

Both sci-fi books were rich and complex, and a headache. I loved them but I was struggling. I woke up every day determined to put in the work but was growing more depressed the more I worked on them. My wife at one time questioned if Blue Sweep had broken me a little. I had to pause work on them for the time being. I felt like I was falling apart. I wanted to write, I needed to write, but everything I was coming up with was just too much. It was just migraines and depression and bad habits and I couldn't get outside of my own head to focus.

I'd always heard stories of authors who whipped up a book quickly. I thought, I'd like to do that. Just fingers-to-keys-balls-to-the-wall. Of course, then, it's "What's it about?" Back in my first novel Last Rites of the Capacitance I had a few action scenes. My publisher told me I wrote action scenes well and I should keep that in mind in the future. Well, that future had arrived. I thought, I've got it! I wanted to make a short 100 page action adventure story. I came up with my hero Agent Phoenix and his surroundings Carbine City, and I was off. I didn't tell Supposed Crimes I was writing it. Usually I'd send in ideas but this time I just decided I'd write it quickly and turn it in.

That didn't happen.

I managed to keep it under wraps; however, it wasn't a quick write at all. I started it around the spring or summer of 2018. I found out quickly that I'm not that type of writer. So I was getting frustrated from the jump. I'd try to write what came to mind and get it all out but the book forced me to slow down. I can't explain it. It was a fight between me and the book. I'd love it, write, then hate that it was controlling the way it was wanting to be written. It's a science-fiction-action-adventure book. Very pulpy. Despite aggravations, and plenty of times of walking away, I was drawn to Agent Phoenix. Which is why in the beginning of this I said in spurts. I'd write for a while, it would go well, then I was angry with it and left; then come back.

Nobody really knew about it. Nobody had read any of it. I just fought with it until it was written. During the long process, I needed something to go to when I'd had my fill of the good Agent. That's when I came up with my third volume of poetry Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights. My third novel and my third poetry book were written together. I had similar struggles with the poetry book in terms of wanting to do something fast and then finding out I'm not that guy.

I was some ways into Agent Phoenix and Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights when work stopped. Forever tied to the writing of these two books, my father passed away and stopped me in my tracks. I was bereft. I didn't think about writing, just trying to cope. Everything finally had come to a head when I realized I either was going to shut down completely or I was going to dive into my work, so that's what I did. I jumped back into both books with blinders on. My approach was changing and the fighting with both of them was stopping.

Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights took me to some dark places but out of that came my best poetry. Stylistically, Agent Phoenix went on without a hitch. It was the actual work and approach that was the hiccup. However, it was turning out just like I wanted. It's bright and colorful and full of action. It just went on for a long time, much longer than anticipated, and ended up twenty pages over my target.

My approach for the story of Agent Phoenix was like that of a TV show. Agent Phoenix battles colorful foes in the neon-drenched futuristic city of Carbine City but the underlying threat is his arch nemesis Baxter Combs. One thing I found interesting was how sci-fi it got. My plan was pulpy action adventure, like a comic book or a movie or series, but when I was reading it to my wife, I was like 'There's a lot of sci-fi in this.' She said, "I thought you knew." I shrugged. I love sci-fi so I guess it came natural but it wasn't my intention. I was just focused on trying to write a fun book.

I finished the poetry book first and turned it in. Then about a month or so later I finished Agent Phoenix and sent it in. I was nervous and waited while toying with various story ideas. While waiting to hear back, I noticed the change Agent Phoenix had on my writing going forward. I tried not to think of how they were liking my two submissions. The poetry book was picked up first and got a good response. Agent Phoenix was taking longer, and I became more anxious. What if it sucks? What if they hate it? When I finally got word back, it was good news. My publisher loved it and said something I was hoping to hear - "It's a really fun book." - and that they'd be publishing it. I was elated.

The release dates were set. Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights came out September 1st 2019 and Agent Phoenix was scheduled for February 1st 2020. We ended up pushing the date back to April, which I was happy with as it gave me time to work on my current books. Now that it's out, it feels weird. Old and new at the same time. With enough distance between the work and its release, it's hard to see the fighting at all when I look back. I'm excited for people to read it and have a good time.

Since finishing both the poetry book and Agent Phoenix, I've been hard at work on more that I will tell you about soon. I hope you all check out Agent Phoenix. I thank you for reading, now I've gotta get back to work.

-Christopher

Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Quarantine Writing

I’ve been cooped up writing this past year. When the Coronavirus hit and the social distancing and quarantines started, nothing changed for me. My wife and daughter work with the public and I have Multiple Sclerosis so I’m “at risk”. But so far I’m safe. It just feels weird hearing and reading the chaos and nothing really coming close to home. I live a very monk-like life and I write all the time. I’ve got a lot of things going on and I can’t wait for you to see them. Right now I can say that my poetry book, Loose Lipped Secrets and Twinkling Lights, is still available and my next novel, Agent Phoenix, is out April 1st.

Time to get back to my “quarantine” writing. Stay safe, everyone!